setting in

I cant seem to make things right,  nor make them seem anything near correct... i fucking hate how things are going.., what say i want to go out and have a goddamn life? am i wrong for that?? i seem to be hurting everyone around me.. and i don't seem to get why,,,

ups and downs

  Reality set in today.

  I realize i have done some crappy things, people know. And i know.

  I am so ready to get this school paperwork finalized.. I can't seem to get through to anyone about it; My character has gone to shit apparantly. I thought this would be the time to change, seems if I was yet again wrong,
 I am still working and working, getting more the hang of it and making better sales. Still not enough money.

    I need schooling, and want it. And i want more friends. I miss you guys in texas.

Little eva is sick along with her mommy.. I can't do anything from here..


 Back to this, home life is pretty boring, i feel i should be able to go out and have a good time..

  I really hate songs that make you think back on what you can never have back in your life again...

a belief.

You loved it when my heart dropped, paused, stopped, and walked awayfull of content that it went your way
these cuts that i've caused are never to deep to heal peel back the bandage, see a scar from countless careless thingsfeel yourself drifting, pulled awaywell nothing feels real anymorei'm not taking my time anymoreto show you how i feelto show you who i am
cause it's locked away

we all need to find our way
cut the loss, just walk away

A kiss of shame tempts me to question love.
Her sweet taste kills all beauty.
Eyes of a goddess, I fall prison to.
A heart of a fool oh I've been cursed.

A Goddess of love,
She imprisons me.

So take my, take my hand.

I wont forget.

Her skin is crawling with regret the feeling of nothing,
Is this, all she ever wanted?

Her dress flows red, shimmering,
Reflections of the damned, cast upon these walls.
They scream for salvation.

and so this is it

I have come to conclude that all means well.

     I wish that things could be different in my life, i want things to be something more than they are. I keep trying to find what that or if that is possible. Should i be looking? or thinking?

  I have been told that i should just watch and wait. Look towards the the light, the time will come.


 I hate this feeling of being left behind, is this really real? Nothing feels real anymore. the time has no place in here.

   I'm ready for something real, ive been waiting on something real, to show how i feel. This has yet to come, has yet to overcome me. Did you ever feel i could get this way? We can all make mistakes, and ill show you, show you the ending, of how i really feel. Just look towards the light.


   Do not judge me, don't sit there with your words of  hate. i do not pass my judgement on you.

 fuck the past start living now. Most of you cannot justify this. Why shoud i be the only one?  I want so much more. And i expect so much less. There in lies the problem.

miss may i

Somethings haven taken over who I am.
I went cold finding my way back.
Places only seen by ones will want to be.
Lost consumes masses of a dying breed.
Hammered through life a nail to seal this demise.
This light will show forever and a day.
This is where I want to be.
Where there's comfort in everything.
This is where I want to be.

miss may i

Somethings haven taken over who I am.
I went cold finding my way back.
Places only seen by ones will want to be.
Lost consumes masses of a dying breed.
Hammered through life a nail to seal this demise.
This light will show forever and a day.
This is where I want to be.
Where there's comfort in everything.
This is where I want to be.

after all of that,

i can;t get through to you.  black friday and right now, a movie and i need to pass out.

song stuck in my head, well actually a few.

A kiss of shame temps me to question love.
Your sweet taste,
Kills all beauty.
Eyes of a goddess I fall prison to.
A heart of a fool, 
I've been cursed .

A goddess of love
She imprisons me

So take my, take my hand
I won't forget
Her skin is crawling with regret
The feeling of nothing
Is this all she ever wanted

Her dress flows red, shimmering.
Reflections of the damned
Cast upon walls.
They scream for salvation.

Breaking everything I seem to love 


If every star fell out of the sky tonight
Every wish I’d make would take me closer to you
Have you ever wanted something so bad it hurts?
To never wake from the world that you once knew

You said we'll meet where the dreams are made
So I'll climb in my battered ship and voyage to the ends of the earth
Closing my eyes and setting sail on the dark waves
We'll suck this dream world dry of every ounce of love that it's worth

I’ve fallen and I can’t get up, such intoxicating synergy
Flying to the highest mountains and swimming through the darkest deepest seas

I'll search for what mother nature finds most divine
Let’s get lost in this moment, I’ll do anything to make you mine
Inhaling each other’s ecstasies, admiring your God-given design
Together forever, finally our souls can intertwine




We'll wake the dead tonight to tell them all about the love we found
Sitting and listening to the dry bones crawl out of the ground
They'll dance till dusk with great bliss and celebration
And then they'll hide like the moon when it sees the sun

I’ll search for what mother nature finds most divine
Let’s get lost in this moment, I’ll do anything to make you mine
Inhaling each other’s ecstasies, admiring your God-given design
Together forever, finally our souls can intertwine

if this could happen, because i believe in fate.

If it is meant to be, then that's how it should be. maybe not now, maybe not tomorrw. but 5 years?    that's something worth questioning.

Fried Turkey Is done!

                  Thanks to my wonderful co-worker, she and her husband i am the proud participant in eating a fried Turkey for thanksgiving! The even better part of all of this is that not one person that we are having dinner with, have ever had a fried turkey!! Thank you for making it for me!! :)))

 And to everyone else,

 HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!! Gobble gobble!! Eat up!  Pic of the Fried Goodness!

Now onto Football, Let's Go Cowboys !

Enough is Enough

 It's like you both much talk to one another, because you both want to talk and cause so much drama! Jeesh, this is annoying!

 Backing up a little bit, I moved away from my fiance in Texas, and now she won't stop talking to me, granted i know she "loves" me or whatever it may be..Obsession ( Cough ) But now, this new girl that was in the picture has been getting into contact with My ex, and it's just causing so much crap. How stupid can someone be to talk to someone's ex right after they leave them. I seriously moved 1300 miles away and still can't shake the cancer. What must a guy do?

  I've got it. work and spend time with family, screw the bull shit. I've seriously outgrown it. I should write a book on the crazy events that have been happening, and shit I can I am to blame for most of it! I put myself in stupid situations, and for what? Nothing. That's right.



*
Tomorrow is looking like it's going to be a good day, I am definitely hitting up the beach, it's supposed to be in the 80's.

I need to get these

Shit is wack!

   Today  was a great day at work, the last 20 minutes i was there i had a 500.00 sale! Made my sales go up to 1350 for the day. All in all was a good day. Now i'm off for two days and trying to plan out what I am going to do. Maybe hangout with some people I haven't seen in awhile. Who knows!


 ON to have some Chocolate cake, and finishing up watching Family guy.

And for all this nonsense that has happened to me, why would you even want to say "I miss your company". I think that's far gone.

Good combination :)

Two Days Till Thanksgiving!

  Looking forward to having fried turkey, and spending the day with family and friends. I have off work Wed-Thurs. Work today from 12-5.

Two And a Half Men

   I have been watching this show for hours now, and yet it still isn't getting old. Up to season 6. Charley is pretty damn funny.

   Clever people those creators are.

           Also something that happened last night, Chris Wilson died, It's not like we were close, or even really friends, but he was friends with a lot of my friends here in Sarasota. It's a shame people overdosing on some stupid drugs, for a few hours of feel good, to go and end it all. Sucks you went out like that, you're going to be missed by a ton of people. R.I.P

 

Speedie's For Dinner tonight.

I haven't had these in so long! Pork chunks on a skewer, with a special marinade.  

The name “Spiedie” derives from the Italian word “Spiedini”, which refers to anything cooked on a skewer.  This idea was brought to Up-State New York (Binghamton)  by Italian Immigrants in the early 1900’s. Today, Spiedies are made from a variety of meats(usually pork, chicken, or lamb), and are marinated in a blend of herbs and spices and cooked over an open flame. The Spiedie became a huge hit and remains to be in most of central NY State.  It became so popular that a few locals began arguing over who had the best spiedie in town. They then created an annual festival to determine who’s were #1

Greatest beer pong trick shots.  Just check it out.

Awesome stuff!

Some random Shots.

All of these were taken a few years back, pulling them off my Facebook.

Sunset A few years back.

A few photos I have taken.

This is when we were right in front for Blink 182!

False Start

     Ready to get back in the groove, times need to change! Started out this move really great, it took meeting someone to go and mess things up. Oops! I won't do that again. I seem to get myself into stupid situations, trying to help someone else when I in fact just need to help myself. 

    I've been working for a few weeks now, got my first paycheck! 428.00$ Whomp. I'm now on commission with a base pay of 6.00.. We'll see how it goes. Although I do like my job, I think I might have to find something that pays better if I want to be able to what I want to do. The two lady's I work with are Great people!!

And if you're wondering what my title "Agaetis Byrjun" Means? It's Icelandic for it's an Alright Start. or 

                Ágætis byrjun (Icelandic pronunciation: [ˈaːuɣaitɪs ˈpɪrjʏn], A good beginning^[2]) 

(It's also an album from and icelandic Post Rock band.)

   I am going to be writing about everything that I have done, and that I plan on doing. Hope you enjoy!